


from my perspective

by watercolorgalaxies



Category: None - Fandom
Genre: Friendship/Love, Love, Love Poems, Poetic, Poetry, Prose Poem, Slam Poetry, Unrequited Love, love poetry, prose
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-18
Updated: 2018-09-23
Packaged: 2019-04-04 04:31:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14012250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/watercolorgalaxies/pseuds/watercolorgalaxies
Summary: a collection of poems and prose written by me.





	1. and i wait.

you are a masterpiece  
heaven itself laced  
between your fingertips  
pale blue eyes and summer skies  
a smile belonging  
to no one else  
but i am only  
a face in the crowd.

i am the horizon  
you settle with for a moment  
when you do the world lights up  
in blood red  
(but you don’t watch,  
there are better things to wait for,  
you will see many more sunsets)

your silhouette is a year gone  
but i can’t look away,  
you can’t fade.  
i still remember  
every waking moment  
and it is the most beautiful torture,  
you are nicotine in my lungs,  
my phantom love.

i remind myself  
(it keeps me sane)  
there is still hope you’ll return  
whether it be as yourself  
or as someone else  
i’d wait a million years for you.  
(or certainty)

and so the speck of dust  
fell hopelessly in love  
with every universe.  
you want more, and i get so bored  
(you’re fine, why aren’t i?)  
(i’m scared to ask these questions)  
(you know you are the muse behind every love story)

you are art and poetry  
but art like you can’t be touched.  
immaculate strokes of paint  
a two dimensional, romanticized memory  
my worst damn enemy. 

lately this place feels like forever.  
i am running out of words to write,  
and nobody shines quite like you.

oh, how i’m addicted to my imagination  
even though you can’t know  
someone you haven’t known for this long

everyone carries on  
and i am left standing static.  
i wait  
i wait  
i wait to be healed  
nothing changes.  
i don’t know how this story will end. 

my love, you’ve always been my only one,  
you’re the affliction i love.


	2. two in the morning

the hour you left   
the hour you lied  
it's so far gone  
it should blur by now

but in my mind  
it was only yesterday  
i remember every date  
every detail

you are a scar   
or a work of art

a taste of daisies  
and sun  
and the love everyone else  
will hold sometime

or a careless thing  
of nightmares   
that haunt the emotional

i can't tell which  
all i know is that i wish you would  
kiss me until my lips fall off  
carve my heart out of my chest   
fuck me in a pool of my own blood  
bite my lips while you feel my heart falter  
and after that you can be with her  
i'll be dead so i won't care

but i wish you would  
run your hands down my shaking spine  
hold my tear stained cheek in your palms   
smile and go with me to the fucking park  
hold my fucking hand  
fucking smile at me   
say you fucking love me  
sit on a bench and fucking talk to me

all or nothing  
all i need  
without you  
a tortured soul  
with you   
the luckiest person in the fucking world  
please do something  
please do something   
please do something to me  
anything  
anything  
you can kill me  
i'd be fine if you killed me  
or kissed me  
as long as you think about me  
as long as i matter  
and the last thing i see is you

don't leave me  
don't leave me alone  
don't leave me with myself  
don't be with anyone else  
you're the only one who makes me feel alive

fill this void  
light me up with ecstasy   
or agony  
i really don't care which  
please   
i need to feel human  
please  
tell me i'm not crazy  
please please please  
i love you  
but i hate you

i don't know how  
i don't know how  
i don't know how  
i don't know how  
to say this out loud  
i love you  
i say i hate you  
but i feel like   
i have to  
i have no control

i'm sorry  
i'm sorry   
i'm an idiot  
i love you  
please stay 

"why are you talking to yourself?"


	3. an open letter to anyone trying to get over someone

i know,   
i know their eyes hold your whole universe and their arms are a home you’ve never understood  
and their laugh makes flowers grow in your lungs and you’re drowning in the sickly sweetness of them  
you have a million snapshots in your head of every summer afternoon  
you’ve looked at them so much you’ve convinced yourself they aren’t real

i know,  
but darling, you need to stop  
i know you’re in the awkward phase of healing where you’ve outgrown them but you still think about them when you lie awake  
when the blood has stopped flowing but you can’t quite tear off the bandaid  
i know you scream along to music in your room  
imagining confronting them about what they put you through  
i know you think about if you saw them again  
would they say you’re different?

the memories are so distant and you haven’t seen them in a year and you’re clinging onto a phantom hand  
and you can’t delete the pictures of them because they’re the last thing you have of your past of seeing colors so bright they’ve made you blind  
and everything besides them is boring  
i know you make up loves in your head  
that aren’t any of the things wrong with them  
and pray the characters from your imagination walk into your life

i know you would go through hell just to spend one more day like nothing changed  
there’s no way to describe it  
all you know is you loved them and loved them and loved them  
you loved them too deeply to comprehend  
and you would have spent forever loving them  
but it wasn’t enough

and there’s still an ocean of tears from when you said goodbye  
and no one will ever make you feel that much  
there’s no pain like thinking that you’re not enough  
i know it darling,  
i know it better than anyone

but you need to let go  
cut the weeds from your fragile lungs  
learn to breathe like your head never slipped under the waves  
and let time ease your mind  
until you forget their name  
and learn to let go.


End file.
